Marathons and Murders

Well which ‘M’ should I deal with first? I think I had better confess to the murders. It features Mr Usain Bolt (my mouse). In fact Usain has been out into the big wide world and acquired a wife. In fact, I think that he is a good Muslim mouse and he has acquired up to four wives. I have spied them on training runs doing circuits of my kitchen. On my way out of the house this morning I spied chewed up pieces of material and wood on the floor underneath my make shift settee (a folded double mattress covered in a sheet). As I lifted up the corner of the mattress there to greet me were the fruits of Usain’s labours (I should think Mrs Bolt had more to do with the labour side of things). Six (not three) blind, squirming pink little mice. What was I to do? As I was late for work, quick thinking was in order. I used my diary to scoop them onto a plate and then deposited them under a bush outside. When I got home from work there was no sign apart from a lizard sitting on the wall with a very contented smile on its face. Please forgive me Mr and Mrs Bolt.


The second M was just as painful but in a different way. About three months ago when the new volunteers came out my new running mate informed me that he was doing the Brufut half marathon and would I like to do it. So I said I would if I hadn’t already flown home for Xmas which is what happened last year (I was secretly hoping I’d be well on my way back to the UK). As luck would have it we broke up a week later so I was committed. Our training went well, we were used to the heat and we managed a couple of longer runs along sandy African tracks. ‘M’ day came and the start was only 45 minutes late which is good going for Gambia. The problem was that I don’t think the concept of fun running has reached The Gambia. The opposition all seemed to resemble male and female Mo Farah looky likies. The gun went and they were off leaving a trail of smoke behind them while the V.S.O. contingent were left to bring up the rear. A little bit like the hare and tortoise except in this case the hare did not go to sleep and the tortoise never caught up. The ambulance did keep checking the back markers every now and then to see if we were still in the land of the living and hand out the odd bag of water. We got a fine reception into Brufut, lots of clapping, cheering and most disconcertingly hysterical laughter. I tried to look behind me to see if I’d split my shorts or I’d done a Paula Radcliff and peed myself but I couldn’t get to the bottom of what caused the mirth. Thankfully my colleagues had the same treatment as they came in. Maybe they just couldn’t believe their eyes. We did it and raised a few bob in the process. Not something I’ll be rushing to repeat in the near future though.

June’s tip for the month - Remember small pink wiggly things turn into fast fertile furry things!

Before

After and still smiling

The Back of Beyond

No sooner were we back at work and we were sent to the far flung reaches of Gambia. What had we done to upset our leader, I asked myself. Then I remembered way back last term I just happened to mention that I hadn’t been out to region six on my expeditions yet. Whoever did the trek rotas must’ve remembered my words and decided to despatch myself and fellow volunteers armed with a few gallons of mosquito repellent, hand sanitizer and enough toilet roll to serve a small army. In fact, toilets were our main topic of conversation for the whole week. We started our week with nought out of ten for the state of the toilets. It was a miracle that we didn’t come back with a severe dose of cholera. Things got progressively better over the week. Teachers evacuated their quarters to put us up and also shared their food bowls with us wherever we went. We could not thank them enough especially when you consider some of the hardships that they have to endure. One school had nowhere to house their staff so they ended up sleeping in the store rooms in the back of their classrooms.

Breakfast on the road

Our first school visit, not very water resistant.

The school kitchen where various shades of brown with rice are prepared - yum!

The cook with a small bowl of rice.

The scenery and experience was awesome. I’m sure tourists would have paid hundreds to follow in our footsteps. Our last nights accommodation was the best, we even had a T.V. to watch. Sleeping wasn’t all that easy. As well as the heat an army of earwigs invaded our room so the night was spent flicking them off various parts of our bodies. When we compared notes in the morning we decided there was probably just one earwig and the unfortunate creature was just being flicked from bed to bed.

I have just had a very welcome stranger (visitor), my baby, who now towers over me and nearly breaks my ribs in a warm welcoming embrace. In his words we had an awesome week. Very conveniently the Presidential elections coincided with his visit which meant I had time off work and we could do the touristy thing. We had a mixture of beach days, forest days, luxurious hotel day and watching premiership football in the local video clubs (a shed with a telly), there’s no escaping it. We paid our 20p entrance fee and was treated to a rendition on ‘You’ll never walk alone’ at the end of the Man City game. It all seemed very surreal, I couldn’t quite understand why Kenny Dalgleish was wearing gloves and his nose was turning blue when we were sweltering in 40 degrees. Is it cold in the UK?

Pictures at sunset

Tom cooking up a storm for the compound.

Our day of luxury

June’s tip for the month – Never flick unwelcome earwigs just politely show them the door.